Saturday, March 5, 2016

You've Got a Friend in Jesus

“Knots Untie”: Episode the Tenth

Ugh, so many bad Jesus jokes last week! But you can hardly blame me. TWD introduced a Jesus character—sort of—and I just went with it. He’s no Christ figure, though. More of a dippy hippie, if you ask me. After somehow getting past Daryl and another guard, Jesus ends up in Rick and Michonne’s den of passion as they lay in flagrante delicto on a soiled futon! Does the romance ever start? Hey, everyone, it’s Jesus, the ultimate cock block. “Rick,” he whispered, unflinching even as a startled Michonne brandishes her katana and Rick draws his gun, “We have to talk.”

Episode 10 opens with the Ginge and Sasha strolling through the gates. He makes her laugh, and we laugh along with them. One yearns for a little levity in this “Brave New World.” How does Ginger keep his flat top so flat? The Ginge finds out that his partner Sasha is going to be replaced by Eugene. So long, workplace romance…Cut to a sweaty scene of Rosita and Abraham (Ginger) cuddling in bed naked. However, his thoughts wander back to the lovely Sasha.

Night. Maggie the fertile farmer is preoccupied with planting crops, and Glenn agrees that this is a capital idea. A sudden movement across the street diverts their attention, as does some spooky music. Jesus has entered Rick’s house in his customary, totally non-creepy way. Karl with a K trains his gun on him. Jesus has already cased the joint. He appreciates being brought back to Alexandria. He claims he hails from a community much like Rick’s. Why not come for a visit? “Your world’s about to get a whole lot bigger,” he promises. Yet is this what our embattled group needs right now? Expand or die. They need more badasses.

Rick mulls over the possibilities of enhancing the gene pool via Jesus’ promises of more humans. If they are murderous, psychopathic humans with annoying facial hair, however, perhaps they are better off with their present slim pickins. In the truck, Glenn rests his hand on Maggie’s tummy. Ginge has some enigmatic questions for Glenn regarding procreation, but he couches it in term of pouring Bisquick and making pancakes. Ginge questions the sagacity of making little humans when the world has gone to crap. Glenn responds that they are simply thinking of the future.

A truck that seems to have been driven by walkers lies overturned at the side of the road. Either that, or the truck ran over a couple of zombies and they got pinned inside of it. Jesus wants a gun so he can help his people, who may be in trouble inside a nearby house. Rick says sure, and while you’re at it, tell me another good joke. Rick handcuffs Jesus, who is still sporting his grubby watchman’s cap, in case he’s playing another trick. Rick instructs Maggie to shoot Jesus if his suspicions prove correct.

Upon entering the house, one hears the dulcet tones of snarling walkers. Jesus’ friends are cornered. One man refuses to leave with Rick’s people, claiming he’s still looking for his friend who was hurt in the crash. The group hightails it outta there with Harlan, a doctor. He happens to be an obstetrician, so I guess Maggie just found the right guy to deliver her baby. A man named Freddy, on the other hand, is PTSDing it up in the truck.

The wheels spin in the Georgia mud. But Jesus says, no prob, we’re here, at “The Hilltop.” A standoff occurs between Rick’s armed group and the armed lookouts guarding the gates. Jesus vouches for Rick, and Open Sesame. The Hilltop looks a lot like another fancy gated community slightly worse for the wear. Trailers surround a living-history house-museum called Barrington House. There are crops and even farm animals.

Inside the house, a man named Gregory, sort of a poor man’s version of the Most Interesting Man in the World, asks Rick to take a shower. After everyone goes upstairs to wash up, the Ginge probes Daryl for the skinny on Rick and Michonne “bumping uglies.” Uh, Daryl isn’t exactly one to yenta it up, so he ignores him.

Gregory and Maggie have a convo in his office. She’s curious about the origins of the community. He fishes for info regarding guns and medications. Gregory knows that Alexandria is wanting, but he’s willing to give them a leg up by putting them to work. Maggie wants to trade. Gregory says nah, we’re good.

Jesus’ hair totally looks like a wig. With all the money put into zombie special effects, one would think they could throw a few bucks into the fake hair fund. Trouble raises its ugly head in the form of one Neagan, whom you will recall as the guy who steals from other survivors. A group of Hilltopians return with bad news for Gregory: Neagan wasn’t happy with their recent offering and killed a few of their own in retaliation. Then the messenger stabs Gregory, because Neagan asked him to. Rick tackles the attacker, and in the melee Ginge is strangled by a beefy guy. Rick is also pinned by a guy holding a knife to his throat, but someone intervenes and slices the guy’s throat. “Ethan,” however, had fans, angry Hilltopians who are mad he’s dead. Jesus intervenes on Rick’s behalf.

Ethan was a douchenozzle, he asserts. The Alexandrians stopped his cowardly rampage. The lack of oxygen to the Ginge’s brain has induced an epiphany. Gregory doesn’t share his euphoric state. He’s still lying prone and gurgling.

During a cozy sit-down with Jesus in the fancy main house, Jesus details Neagan’s long history of intimidation and confrontation with the Hilltop group. Half of everything goes to Neagan’s people. In exchange, they don’t kill the Hilltopians. Daryl pipes up that this is some bullshit right here; why not just kill all of Neagan’s people? But the Hilltop dwellers are farmers and workers, not killers. Jesus takes the proposal to Gregory, who then requests that he wants to speak to Maggie.

Gregory is ensconced in covers sitting up in a solid wooden bed. Fancy. Maggie says she’ll take care of Neagan and get the kidnapped Hilltopian Greg back IF he shares his supplies. Jesus will make it happen. Maggie notes that without ammunition and badasses, Gregory’s people are finished; she asks for half, just like Neagan At least it’s not a totally bad deal.

Rick asks beefy guy for intel on Neagan’s compound. Jesus wants to tag along. Michonne and Rick are ready to fight. Meanwhile, Glenn and Maggie have their first OB-GYN appointment, complete with ultrasound, when they catch a glimpse of their itty-bitty baby. They pass the resulting picture around. The Ginge lingers on the photograph and cracks a smile. And that’s the end of a somewhat disappointing episode! In sum, for now, you have a friend in Jesus. Glenn is a good husband for tagging along with Maggie to her first prenatal. And who knows how the Ginge was affected by his recent lack of oxygen.

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